All the non-verbal cues from the other inmates suddenly screamed at me. Magically, I was able to tell a bitch from a daddy and all the ones undercover. I wondered what vibe I was throwing off but already knew the answer.All the chafe fired out there to deceive was useless. I could see right through it now.The days of walking tough were over. They all knew me whether or not they saw a dick in my mouth. Funny how easy it was to fool the outside world but there was no faking in prison. The world was muddled and segregated and stratified enough to begin with, but here, everyone was on the same level standing in the open juxtaposed against stark white walls.The fact I followed Nave back to his cell in front of two hundred guys stripped away my manhood. I couldn't have announced it and made it any clearer that I was surrendering all those things I'd spent nineteen years telling myself.It was an odd struggle to figure out how to act. I didn't want to make all those crazy exaggerated motions. I tried to make it obvious to him that I wanted to be with him but I dont know if he was just not interested or if he really didnt pick up on how I felt. Either way we both shared our feelings and other things a few weeks before the end of the school term. Life was boring for me now, I had nothing to do outside of school other than play video games and read. School provided a constant stream of homework and distractions from my miserable life but even that would expire when school finished for summer in a week. All that was left was the week coming and the week after then Id be alone for 6 whole weeks, with nobody but my parents for summer, it was back to how it was before Id even met Derek. It wasnt until Thursday, the night before the last day of term, that Derek and I actually talked to eachother properly. He came over to my house asked if I was coming out, obviously I was curious as to why hes suddenly decided to talk to me so I grabbed my coat and went out with him. For hours we.
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